"Michael Jackson was the most popular and famous singer in the entire world."
"If you wanted to watch a movie, your parents would have to drive you to a video rental store, where for the price of a candy bar you would get a plastic cassette the size of your new computer. It didn't have special features or anything, and you had to wait for all the trailers and advertisements to play. When you were done watching it, you were supposed to 'be kind and rewind.' You very rarely rewound."
"Coffee came in one flavor and three sizes. If you wanted it sweeter, you'd add powdered saccarine that gave lab rats cancer."
"We used to use lab rats to see what could give people cancer. We hadn't yet found out that lab rats have the always-be-getting-cancer gene."
"People thought it was weird to elect an actor to political office."
"People thought you could contract AIDS from toilet seats. This included government officials in charge of the AIDS crisis."
"People thought that people like your Uncles Tony and Carl were going to hell."
"People thought $6 was too much to pay for a movie."